Life Coach Training
Lesson 24
Belief and Relief
In an earlier lesson we underscored the role of coach as a bringer of relief to the client. In this lesson we will look more deeply at the relationship between belief and relief, and how a coach can use this relationship to facilitate peace of mind and well-being in a client.
Here is a hypothetical scenario that will lead us to our lesson:
A friend or client comes to you and reports that he is in a great deal of pain physically or emotionally. He then hands you an amulet (precious stone) and tells you, “I know that if you wave this amulet over my head three times and say, ‘Abracadabra,’ I will feel better. Will you please do this now?”
What would be your response? What would you do? Why?
Please think out your response before reading below. When you have an idea of what you would do, read on.
This situation, although hypothetical, represents a very real and practical dynamic that makes a huge difference in your life, the lives of your clients, and the lives of everyone who walks the planet.
Healing—or its apparent absence—is more related to the patient’s or client’s belief system than situational variables. A Course in Miracles tells us:
Who is the physician? Only the mind of the patient himself. The outcome is what he decides that it is. Special agents seem to be ministering to him, yet they but give form to his own choice. He chooses them in order to bring tangible form to his desires. And it is this they do, and nothing else. They are not actually needed at all. The patient could merely rise up without their aid and say, “I have no use for this.” There is no form of sickness that would not be cured at once.
– A Course in Miracles, Manual for Teachers, p 18
If your client believes that the waving of an amulet or any other “permission slip” will make him feel better, it will. Not because the amulet or permission slip has power in and of itself, but because the client believes in it—and belief has power.
Since your goal for the client is to reduce his suffering and bring relief, you might do well to wave the amulet for him. Gandhi said it is useless to talk to a hungry man about God, because his hunger will drown out all voices but the one that says, “I need food.” If someone is in pain, it is not the time to ask her, “How did you create this?” Instead, do what you can to help the client find peace of mind in the immediate moment. For this she will be deeply grateful and so will you.
But your coaching is not complete if you leave your client with the belief that the amulet has power. Only the mind has power, and all power we attribute to external objects, methods, people, and situations, is a projection of the mind. At some point you might ask the client what beliefs might have led to the pain he was in, and what beliefs might have relieved him from it. The timing and verbiage of this conversation varies according to client and situation. In some cases you might be able to explore the client’s role in the difficulty and its resolution immediately, and in other cases you might need to wait until a more appropriate time. Use your intuition to tune in to the right timing and words. Your client is truly healed only when she recognizes the link between belief and results.
Relief is your immediate intention. Awakening will come in its own time and way. A good coach facilitates both.
Exercise:
1. Consider a client, friend, or family member who believes that a particular method can help them. Are you supporting that person to use their belief to gain the healing they seek?
If not, what can you do or say to support them toward the relief they seek?
2. What “permission slips” do you subscribe to? What methods do you believe in that do or will work for you to feel better or grow?
3. Are you open to consider the possibility that you are using these permissions slips as a projection of your belief, and that you are achieving success more because you believe in these methods than because they have power in and of themselves?
Affirm:
I use my clients’ beliefs to help them get out of fear or pain.
Then I help them recognize that the source of healing is within them.